Chapter 15: Har Haan Ek Na Bhi Hai
Chapter 15

Har Haan Ek Na Bhi Hai

Hidden Cost

Rhea apni to-do list dekh rahi hai.

Midnight hai. List pe sab "urgent" hai.

  • Placement prep
  • Society ka event organize karna
  • Assignment submit karna
  • Fest ki committee meeting
  • Boyfriend ke saath plans (postponed—again)

Woh teen societies mein hai. Placement prep chal rahi hai. Relationship bhi handle karna hai. Aur abhi-abhi fest organize karne ka haan bol diya kyunki "resume pe achha lagega."

Sab dekh ke bolte hain: "Yaar Rhea, tu toh kill kar rahi hai!"

Par andar?

5 ghante ki neend. Anxiety. Ek coffee se doosri coffee. Boyfriend frustrated hai. Health down hai.

Har cheez mein "haan" bol rahi hai.

Par har "haan" actually ek "na" bhi hai—sleep ko, health ko, relationship ko.

Woh "na" dikhti nahi—jab tak bahut late na ho jaye.

Seedhi Baat

Ek cheez samajh:

Har "haan" ek "na" bhi hai.

Kisi ek cheez ko haan bolo, toh automatically kisi aur cheez ko na bol rahe ho—chahe realize karo ya na karo.

Isko opportunity cost bolte hain, aur yeh sirf business ke liye nahi.

Yeh har us insaan ke liye hai jisne kabhi:

  • Kisi project ko haan bola aur burn out ho gaya
  • Kisi draining commitment mein zyada time diya
  • "Bas ek aur cheez" agree ki aur rest miss kar diya

Jab hidden cost nahi count karte, toh pay karna padta hai—aise tarike mein jo bank statement pe nahi dikhta.

Time. Energy. Focus. Health. Relationships.

Yeh bhi currencies hain. Aur yeh limited hain.

Woh Cost Jo Dikhti Nahi

Jo Dikhta Hai vs. Jo Nahi Dikhta

Jab koi fest organize karne ko bole, visible cost dikhta hai: meetings, time, kuch stress.

Par hidden cost bhi hota hai:

  • Mental load: Jab kaam nahi kar rahe tab bhi uske baare mein soch rahe ho
  • Transition time: Ek kaam se doosre mein switch karna
  • Energy drain: Ek aur commitment ka emotional weight
  • Opportunity loss: Jo nahi kar sakte kyunki yeh kar rahe ho

Ek "chhota" 2-hour meeting actually cost karti hai:

  • 30 min prep
  • 2 ghante meeting
  • 1 ghante ka recovery/debrief
  • Plus mental load jo list pe baithi rehti hai

Woh 2 ghante nahi hai. Woh aadha din hai.

FOMO Se Burnout

Especially college mein—har opportunity achhi lagti hai.

  • "Resume pe achha lagega" ✓
  • "Network banega" ✓
  • "Experience milega" ✓

Sab sahi hai. But jab har individually-good cheez ko haan bolte ho, collectively unsustainable ho jaata hai.

Health, sleep, aur relationships ko jo "na" de rahe ho—woh tab dikhti hai jab emergency ban jaati hai.

Rhea Ki Kahani

Ek din Rhea ko anxiety attack aaya.

Midnight thi. Deadline kal. Neend zero. Body give up kar rahi thi.

Usne realize kiya—"Main kya kar rahi hoon?"

Usne list banai last month mein kya-kya haan bola:

  • Three societies (15+ hours/week)
  • Fest organizing (extra 10 hours/week)
  • Placements prep (whatever time bacha)
  • Boyfriend (almost zero time)

Phir pucha: "Inke wajah se kya 'na' bola?"

  • Sleep (5 ghante, sometimes less)
  • Health (gym? kya hai woh?)
  • Relationship (plans cancel, fights badh gaye)
  • Mental peace (constant anxiety)

The Shift

Rhea ne fest committee chhod di.

Friends confused the. "Career ke liye achha tha!"

Par usne calculate kiya: 10 hours/week × 2 months = 80 hours. Resume pe ek line ke liye 80 hours—aur health aur relationship ka cost alag.

Worth it? Nahi.

Ek society bhi kam ki. Ab do mein hai, not three.

Ab

Still busy hai—but breathing room hai.

Placement prep actually better ho rahi hai kyunki focus hai.

Boyfriend ke saath ek date night fix hai—non-negotiable.

Sleep 7 hours most nights.

Career nahi dooba. If anything, jo kar rahi hai woh better quality ka hai.

Decision Tool

Cost Clarity Snapshot

Kisi bhi commitment se pehle real cost check karo.

Cost Clarity Snapshot

Step 1: Iska cost kya hai...

  • Time? (Prep, execution, aur recovery include karo)
  • Energy? (Baad mein drain feel hoga?)
  • Focus? (Kitna mental load add hoga?)
  • Stress? (Emotional weight kya hai?)

Ek 10-minute task bhi hidden prep, transition time, ya emotional drain le sakti hai.

Step 2: Payoff kya hai—aur worth it hai?

Pooch: "Return mein kya mil raha hai—aur spend ke barabar hai?"

Ek fest organizing jo resume pe achhi lagegi but 80 hours legi aur health kharab karegi?
Maybe worth it. Maybe nahi. Par ab tu consciously choose kar rahi hai.

Step 3: Yeh decision aur kya affect karega?

Yahan clarity milti hai.

  • Kya yeh mera important kaam delay karega?
  • Kya yeh mera mood ya energy affect karega?
  • Kisko implicitly "na" bol rahi hoon?

Spreadsheet ki zaroorat nahi.

Bas 30 seconds ki honest thinking before saying yes.

Goal har cheez ko na bolna nahi.
Goal yeh hai ki tumhari "haan" intentional ho.

Last Word

Paper pe tu jeet rahi hai.

Another society. Another responsibility. Another resume line.

Par ek ledger hai jo tu nahi dekh rahi—woh jo track karta hai kya trade kar rahi hai.

Teri energy infinite nahi hai.
Tera time elastic nahi hai.
Tera health aur relationships indefinitely postpone nahi ho sakte.

Har "haan" jo ek cheez ko deti hai, woh "na" hai kisi aur ko.

Aur woh "na" silently compound hoti hai—jab tak emergency na ban jaye.

Sawaal yeh nahi ki "Yeh achhi opportunity hai?"

Sawaal yeh hai: "Is opportunity ke liye kya trade kar rahi hoon—aur woh trade worth it hai?"

Cost count karna shuru kar.
Saari.

Sustainable success aise banta hai.

Recap

Core Insight:
Har haan ek na bhi hai. Time, energy, focus, aur relationships currencies hain—aur har decision spend karti hai.

Tool:
Cost Clarity Snapshot—commit karne se pehle check karo: time/energy/focus mein kya cost hai? Payoff kya hai? Implicitly kisko "na" bol rahi hoon?

Kab Use Karna Hai:
Kisi bhi significant commitment se pehle. Jab overcommitted feel ho par samajh na aaye kyun. Jab "chhoti" request heavy feel kare.

Yaad Rakh:
Woh cost jo bank statement pe nahi dikhti, woh bhi cost hai. Use count karo.